TCP Chimney - No support, turn it off....

TCP Chimney requires network card support, so if you have a network card, like the one in my VM which does not support Chimney - you need to turn it off.

Get-NetOffloadGlobalSetting

ReceiveSideScaling           : Enabled
ReceiveSegmentCoalescing     : Enabled
Chimney                      : Disabled
TaskOffload                  : Enabled
NetworkDirect                : Enabled
NetworkDirectAcrossIPSubnets : Blocked
PacketCoalescingFilter       : Disabled

The ones in BOLD should be disabled, so to accomplish that do this:

Set-NetOffloadGlobalSetting -ReceiveSideScaling Disabled
Set-NetOffloadGlobalSetting -ReceiveSegmentCoalescing Disabled
Set-NetOffloadGlobalSetting -TaskOffload  Disabled

Then run this again:

Get-NetOffloadGlobalSetting

ReceiveSideScaling           : Disabled
ReceiveSegmentCoalescing     : Disabled
Chimney                      : Disabled
TaskOffload                  : Disabled
NetworkDirect                : Enabled
NetworkDirectAcrossIPSubnets : Blocked
PacketCoalescingFilter       : Disabled

Excellent, all done :)